Thursday, November 18, 2010

Crux facta est gravis ad portandum.

The Cross has become to heavy to carry.


Yes, I'm writing on the Cross again. It goes with the writing, "what have I gotten myself into?" It does seem that my cross has become too heavy carry any more. Becoming a Carmelite Monk and working your butt off to remain faithful to the Church and the Pope; is even more difficult; with these people doing what Jesus said they would do, "oh I seen Him over there, no I saw His mother over there and she is going to tell us when the end of the world is."

I know I will take heat again talking on this topic. On Open Line; on EWTN radio; someone asked about the so called "apparations of Mary" in Bosnia. This is what the radio host said, "Yes, there are some good fruit; people coming back to the faith, praying the Rosary more and all of that good stuff; but the past bishop and the new bishop wants all parish or diocese trips to that place stopped; because it has not been okayed by the Church and there is bad fruit as well; disregarding the Pope's Authority and that He is Peter. Mary would never do that; go against Peter; because she knows Jesus gave authority to Peter and Mary loved Peter like a son and Peter loved Mary as a mother."

It is so hard to remain a loyal and faithful Catholic to St. Peter and his successors; when this type of mess is going on inside the Church; where the faithful have become unfaithful and going along and saying these crazy things about so called sightings true sightings of Mary or Jesus or anyone else from Heaven; by whose authority do they have that power to say they are true or false? Peter has the authority; he is the Vicar of Christ and we are to remain loyal to Peter. I have shared all the Vortex episodes and CIA episodes with you and if you have been watching them; you know we are in a serious place; where people want to make a new "catholic" Church to rival Rome.

I hear from it and witness it from all sides; all I want to do is be faithful to my spiritual brother Peter and ask St. Andrew to help me. If one day that so called church is built; it will not last; because it does not have Divine Protection as the One True Church and how do we know that these so called "catholics" are really Catholic or belong to the Church; there is a group of people who call themselves something and Mel Gibson is part of it; believing Pius XII was the only real Pope and after him; just fakers. I learned that on EWTN Radio.

I like Pius XII; but not that much; he will become a saint but he isn't God or a god; so he can't be worshiped.

The devil is coming from all sides and being a angel; I guess he can do that. Plus he has his demons also working with him to do this. It feels like the cross is becoming too heavy to carry but we must carry it and ask for help.

Every time we fall and stop; we become sitting ducks and great targets for the devil and his demons. We must keep moving; a moving target is harder to hit. When I stop moving; I fall and stumble and then I need Confession again and I'm so thankful to God for allowing Confession on Sunday before Mass. It's also a blessing.

We must get up and get cleaned up; plus start moving again. Yes, our souls are being attacked by the devils and we need to protect ourself.

Our cross is fit for ourself and yes it can be made heavy or light. I feel like my cross is very heavy and it seems it has the weight of a few tons. What have I gotten myself into? Something good if I can beat the temptations and keep them from becoming sins. I know I can't do it myself but need God's help and the intercession of the saints.

The devil and his demons like to attack when one is trying to leave the world and become closer to God by joining a cloister religious order. What have I gotten into? I think the hornet's nest was disturb and angry when you start to follow God but the devil doesn't want you to follow Him and will try and do anything and anything means; the temptations will become harder to fight off.

We are all tempted; some worse than others and where the temptation becomes too harsh to fight off and you know you've lost that round but for us; there are more than twelve rounds in this fight. We go into the corner, we get our eye cut open so we can see; we get the bleeding stopped and then we go back out there for another round and another. Confession is like our boxing trainer who fixes us up after each round of the fight. Trust me, it's a fight; but what you can't do in boxing is call for help; in this fight we can call.

Keep fighting and I must also keep fighting and keep getting fixed up in my corner.

God bless

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